We Encourage Women Wednesday: Poetry Edition 1125

We Encourage Women Wednesday: Poetry Edition 1125

I was in a mood trying to write to yall from this overly Christian place. I was starting to feel discouraged because I didn't feel like a Christian should as if there was a monolithic Christian experience. In all honesty, every day is not happy and beautiful, and in this season of rediscovery for me, I am going to take yall on this trip with me. May we all find what we are looking for. I guess this one is for the creatives, the poets, and songwriters. Yall will feel me more than most. Aiight Tribe, love yall for real. 


I don't want to be a toxic Christian. I don't have all of the answers. I don't want to be around people that do. I want to be around people that want to find them with me. I like odysseys and journeys. I don't give unsolicited advice and I can't teach forgiveness yet because I haven't forgiven some key folk in my life that have been instrumental in my demise at one time...including myself. I'm not gracious to myself or even real with myself. I live in a bubble pretending everything is fine when it in fact is not.

 I do not want to be a toxic Christian so don't ask me to interpret God's word yet because right now my faith is shaky and I want so badly to be souled out for the Lord but honestly my soul is tired and worn out. I want to replenish myself but I spend too much time trying to pour into others. I want to be intentional but intentionally pulled myself away from this tragedy we call "service"

I’m a broken piece of a person

I have lived broken for so long that whole feels foreign.

My hands don’t look real to me

Trying to repair things I don’t have the skills to 

But these cuts scars and bruises feel familiar. I'm really close to the pain we have been kicking it for a while

But I’m trying not to be toxic breaking others because I’m inconsistent and cant fix it. Tarnishing others because I’m tainted. 

Ruining lives because I’m bored with church lately. 

I want to experience whole so I can teach others to become it

I want to taste real freedom so I can feed starving people as Jesus did with fish

If I am called to do this, I need time to learn and grow and become a Christian all over again because I'm not doing this right. 

I spend so much time trying to convince others that I'm a believer that I don't spend time believing. 


Inactive faith

Uncultivated gifts

Hidden talents

Spiritually bound and blocked up

Stockholm syndrome

Mental illness



Toxic Christian 


Votes: 0
E-mail me when people leave their comments –

Jacqui Hampton is a columnist, poet, and editor. She is a minister of music and psalmist and educator. She is an author of the book The Cultural Christian: Navigating The Culture While Contending For The Faith (2020) She currently devotes her time to songwriting for other artists and planning for her next book as well as educating the masses.

You need to be a member of The Oracle Mag to add comments!

Join The Oracle Mag


  • This as deep. I know how you fee; I don't think being a Christian was ever easy. but it is tough to follow the values of the Bible in 2020. People want you to fit their unbiblical view of what a Christian is. 

This reply was deleted.