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by Pastor QT Nyathi

 

#1. Thou shalt discipline thy offspring.

The question is not if you should discipline, but how you must administer it. 

If you don't discipline you'll reap deep disappointment, destroy your kids' future, and destabilize the community by raising rascals. Don't be scared to discipline.

Correction is part of God's nature and a sacred command given to every parent.

#2. Thou shalt be consistent in thy discipline.

Discipline should not be moody and unpredictable. 

What is wrong in the presence of the Smiths must not be okay in their absence otherwise you'll confuse your child, in addition to embarrassing yourself in front of your honored guests.

Good discipline is fixed and unchanging.

#3. Thou shalt not just focus on punishment.

Focus on training, not punishment. 

Punishment is enforcing penalties and sanctions for wrongdoing (after a wrong deed has been committed) Training, on the other hand is equipping and education towards good behavior (before any wrong deed is committed) 

Be positive in your approach, not negative.

#4. Thou shalt not allow thy children to divide thee.

Kids are masters at pitting one parent against the other. 

Don't give little Jonny ice-cream if mummy has denied him one otherwise you'll end up fighting each other while the culprit enjoys his treat in peace.

Always verify with your partner before making a decision.

#5. Thou shalt set a few clear rules in thy household.

Don't make a thousand ambiguous, clashing or windy rules. 

Numerous laws, bylaws, and subsections only produce confusion, frustration, and rebellion. In the Old Testament, God started off with Ten Commandments, (and over six hundred ceremonial laws) then He reduced them to only two in the New Testament. 

Boil down your expectations to a few easy-to-understand core values.

#6. Thou shalt not discipline with uniformity.

Understand each child's unique personality and temperament. 

Although the rules are the same, your children are different and therefore need to be brought up to the standard in different ways. 

Don't deal with a stubborn strong-willed child the same way you would deal with a tender weak-willed one.

#7. Thou shalt discipline in love.

Never discipline when your anger has erupted like boiling lava. 

Don't vent your anger and frustrations on your children otherwise you'll go overboard and hurt them. 

Only mete out discipline when you are calm and in control.

#8. Thou shalt show the way.

Don't be a signpost that shows the way but doesn't walk the way. 

Children are amazing imitators. It's astonishing (and frightening too) to realize how much of ourselves we see in our children. 

Parenting is as much about modeling good behavior yourself, as it is about molding your kids conduct.

#9. Thou shalt not provoke thy children to anger.

Children are people too. 

They face their own challenges and pressures. They have good days and bad days. They have teeth on both sides of the jaw (although they may not be that many!) Respect your children-don't humiliate them. 

Remember to say sorry and ask for their forgiveness when you've sinned against them.

#10. Thou shalt distinguish between childishness and childlikeness.

Children will always be children. 

They'll always tease, banter, raise a playful fracas, or forget important stuff once in a while. Allow your children to enjoy their childhood. Whack childishness, welcome childlikeness. 

While the Bible instructs us to put away childishness, it urges us to be childlike in faith, simplicity, and humility.

Pastor QT is a published author, copywriter and speaker. His sincerity, wit and candid style have endeared him to many hearts. His book DELIVERANCE UNPACKED has been warmly received globally. He conducts spicy marriage and singles seminars with his feisty wife Bonani.
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